Anymore I just feel like a fake, broken status. And I hate it when I finally get the opportunity to be a little happy and I find myself even more lonely when I'm surrounded by such great people. Sometimes, well, a great deal of the time, I'm containing so much, and I need to scream so much...but I keep playing the game and straightening the face to where I feel ridiculously fake. Emotionally, that is. And it breaks my heart to be that way, because when I try to show something genuine, it's always shot down or underestimated. It hurts, ladies and gentleman, it hurts. :(
Even though I feel this way...I could never be as synthetic or generic as most other people I know.